Flipmode or What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas

It's 5.00am in one of the casino bars at the Mandalay Bay Hotel. Neil Gordon, from Big Balls Films, and I are drinking Heineken, Captain 'n' coke and Patron - mostly at the same time. The beautiful African American hooker that was sitting behind us has just left with the short Mexican guy with the Hitler moustache. It's two and a half hours since we wrapped on the Alesha Dixon video shoot, and approximately one hour since we left directors Max and Dania at the Planet Hollywood casino. Producer Phil Barnes had just thrown the last of their chips on black at the roulette wheel. It landed red. Home time for them.

Neil and I get talking to a young brother and sister from Oregon State. They're drunk. The brother wears the signature slug-like goatee on his chin so beloved of American teenagers. The sister's face is red and blotchy. She's been crying. But she instantly takes a shine to Neil. 'You talk funny' she says as she strokes his hair. Neil runs through his repetoire of comedy English accents. They laugh enthusiastically. He then shows them his Big Balls Films business card. The brother spits his drink: 'No way man. My construction company's called Balls Deep Construction'. Two kindred spirits from other sides of the planet united by a shared sense of humour. It's a beautiful, tender moment, pregnant with erotic possibility.

Neil has to go and pack. His plane is leaving in an hour. He asks the sister if she'd like to come with him to the lift. 'You're really cute, but I'm engaged' she says.

It's 8.00am. I stand in the shower for half an hour trying to sober up before I have to meet Alesha in the lobby. I eat my last Vicodin and some sudafed. The next two tortuous hours are spent talking to Alesha about her album midweeks while trying not to seem drunk.

At 11.00am a distressed Neil calls. He's been rolled at the airport. He put his camera bag down for a second while ordering a coffee and some crackhead made off with it. Piff puff poof. We've lost all the b-roll rushes and all the stills. Luckily I documented the entire shoot on my Flip camera, which comes with inbuilt editing software. Basically you load your selects into a computer and press the Movie Mega Mix button and the program automatically edits your footage.

So here it is. In Your Face TV proudly presents the Alesha Dixon 'Breathe Slow' offical 'making of':


Breathe Slow 'the OFFICIAL making of from inyourfaceTV on Vimeo.

While waiting for our flight connection in LAX, Alesha decides that she wants to go to the nearby Marriott hotel to find a swimming pool to sit by. We eventually locate it on the second floor terrace. It's been drained. As Raymond Chandler said, 'there's nothing emptier than an empty swimming pool'.

Di Wig

Di profile, a wha da gal fool man a wid
Di wig
The latest style we a lik

When General Levy first hiccuped these lines on Dance Energy in 1992, I had no idea how significant they would become for me. I now know. Putting a female solo artist on screen is the hardest work I've known - harder than when I temped at Manpower. On Friday I fly to Las Vegas with Alesha Dixon to shoot the video for her forthcoming single 'Breathe Slow'. So far I've attended 4 wardrobe meetings, 2 hat fittings, 2 choreography rehearsals, 1 nail session and today we have a hair 'trial'. This is the most important part of the process. This is when we fit the Lace Front Weave.


Yeah I hadn't heard of one either until a week ago. If the weave is wrong you might as well pack your bags and go home. If you fuck this up your artist's gonna look like, in the words of the General, a 'picky head'.

And getting the right wig is only the first hurdle. Fitting it is a whole other story. If you glue it too much, it's gonna look like this:


Glue it too little and it might start to slip, leaving you with that authentic bald head eagle, cracky look:


So you have to ask yourself one simple question: what's it worth to get it right?

For some people (including Gwen Stefani) the answer is celebrity hair stylist Danilo. He is apparently the world's leading exponent of the Lace Front Weave. I looked into his availabilty for the Alesha video and was told that his fee is 14 thousand dollars a day. Really.

Sweet Jesus. Give me the wig and some Copy Dex and I'll stick it on. How hard can it be?

New Era plus Campari equals

Idiot.


I just want to take a moment to explain the Campari thing. It has long been recongnized by connoisseurs that Campari is the best drink in the world.

However, that obviously wasn't enough for the CEO of Campari. In classic hubristic fashion he wanted to extend the reach of the brand - he wanted the world.

So he paid a bunch of money for a bottle to be featured in the video for Atlantic's biggest single of the year - T.I's 'Live Your Life'. I'm not joking. At the end of the video, while in 'The Club', T.I. lovingly handles a bottle of Campari for about 10 seconds.

And now kids think Campari is the new Patron. But they've been given no real indication of how you're supposed to drink it. The video certainly doesn't tell you. How fucking irresponsible is that? Kids are probably rolling into the Stratford Rex trying to drink it with Coca Cola or mango juice or some shit.

Unless you handle Campari right it's gonna taste like medicine. So kids - here's an exclusive In Your Face guide to drinking Campari.

In my opinion you've got two options if you're gonna fuck with Campari.

First up: the Negroni (one part gin, one part sweet vermouth, and one part Campari, mixed in an ice filled shaker, garnished with burnt orange). If it doesn't look like this, send it back:


Be careful though. You drop two of these and it's gonna be drunk time. And if you let drunky get on top of you, you're gonna embarrass yourself. It's the alcoholic equivalent of being made to do P.E. in your pants because you forgot your kit.

Second up: the Venetian Spritz (two fingers of dry white wine, ideally a little prosecco, one finger of Campari, a splash of mineral water, and a little slice of lemon to top it off).


This one's for all my civilized, romance loving homies. Girls drink this like it's water and it makes them feel nice. If you can't afford the Easy Jet flight to Venice, you could always try drinking it by the Limehouse Canal in Hackney.

So remember kids - enjoy and respect Campari like a lover and try not to puke on the night bus home.

New Era

On a historic day during which the people of America ushered in a new era of hope and change, New Era in London sent us a product package. Heavy.

They hooked up Stitchthat Bob too. Aaron in our digital department brokered the deal and Samantha Fogden at New Era came through with the 59Fifties - seven and a quarter of course. Very nice of them and very appreciated.

Speaking of New Era, anyone see Dizzee on Newsnight last night? Go to 50mins 30 secs and feel his wisdom.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00frmj1/Newsnight_05112008/

Free product is one of the bedrocks of life. One of my favourite memories is of all the Zoo York pros bum rushing Union Square and selling all their product for hydro and hubba within minutes. That was in '94 when life was better, Chad Muska was still skating, and people were doing these:

Away Day

Last Thursday the entire Atlantic Marketing department was taken off site for a day to a luxurious hotel in Richmond. The objective was simple - we were all there to discover 'who we really were as our authentic selves'.

The seminar was hosted by Dr. Michael Chopich, a former Scientologist who, as a senior Thetan, had relinquished his power to communicate with aliens and started his own self-awareness cult called 'Inner Bonding'. He is pictured below seated at the bottom left of the photograph.


In his introductory address Dr. Chopich told us the following:

'You are all multidimensional spiritual masters living a human life. And your spiritual awakening is the most exciting journey you can undertake in your life'.

The first exercise was designed to break down inhibitions and establish trust within the group. We were divided into pairs and encouraged to lick each other's faces.


The next task challenged our ability to deal with humiliation and bullying. A member of the group was picked at random and forced to wear a 'He Man' wig. The rest of us then taunted him with laughter and tea drinking.


Immediately after lunch we were once again divided into pairs. The focus was now on dispelling negative energy and aligning our chakras. One team member was asked to read a passage from the Upanishads while the other had to hold a giant crystal and through intense concentration channel the 'brow' chakra, thereby awakening the 'pineal eye'. This was probably the least successful of the exercises.


We ended the day with a strange dinner and Gin drinking competition.


As we made our way home the concensus was that we'd all grown as people.